Time to Get Nekked

[Otis]

It's that time of year again -- August 11 -- time to face down the M-car crowd. Yes, that means -- the Summer National Capital Chapter Drive. As you may recall from prior posts, this is the premier event in which ordinary desk jockeys emerge from their downtown office towers, dust off the M-cars, gather the trophy wives, stick their "Driver School Graduate" certificates on the dash, and head to the Baltimore suburbs to join the Summer drive. Whereupon they take off down the backroads of Northern Maryland and Southern Pennsylvania -- (cue Meat Loaf) -- Like a Bat out of HEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!! Mowing down pedestrians and bicyclists on country roads, kicking up dust and gravel as they drift around the twists and turns, spilling the morning latte as they take those turns on two wheels, plowing over Bambi as she tries to cross the road -- nothing could be finer than to drive like one's head is truly, indeed, far entrenched up one's butt.

www.nccbmwcca.org/index.php?id=139,921,0,0,1,0

As you may remember from my post last year, I take a more leisurely approach -- usually bringing up the rear and taking in the scenery. Truth be told, the routes typically are extraordinary -- and it beats me why someone would want to drive 100 mph down a backroad, instead of enjoying the sites that the countryside has to offer. But, to each his/her own. And so, unless a tropical storm hits (like last year), I will be at the drive, probably with Otis, maybe with Klaus (E-30), but not with Izzy (Isetta). Izzy is afraid of M-cars.

Yours truly, Otis

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cg5yNqIeLb4

PS -- why is this post entitled, "Time to Get Nekked"? Because, as everyone knows, I like to shock everyone at these events by showing up with no pants on. This year, however, maybe I'll go with a speedo. It's a bit more sanitary for hot summer days, on Otis' genuine immitation naugahyde seats.

[InkaSteve]

This year, however, maybe I'll go with a speedo. It's a bit more sanitary for hot summer days, on Otis' genuine immitation naugahyde seats.

Would that be a MPH or a KPH Speedo??

You know that this post will show up on every search for info on Speedo's...

[Otis]

InkaSteve, I honestly wasn't thinking about the search engine. Judging from the number of wheel-offset posts, no one uses it, anyway.

BTW, I was in Venice Beach and Santa Monica today (Tuesday), on business. By and large, I didn't spot a single speedo -- except for this one guy working out at the Muscle Beach Gym. He had a speedo. And lots of Henna tats. Truly grotesque. It makes me re-think my decision to wear a speedo to the Car Club drive. Ditto for the Borat thong (there was one of those, too - on roller skates).

[InkaSteve]

How about some tasteful Gold "Mango" shorts?? Like Chris Kattan (Mango) wore on Saturday Nite Live.

[Otis]

Don't touch the Mango!!!