The world is full of flakes (buyers)

[prsncat]

For whatever reason, I seem to be encountering a higher degree of folks who think it is okay to:

1. Make an offer to buy and then not carry through. And, I don't collect a deposit because I would still prefer to trust people to want to buy the car.

2. Tell me they will meet and then they don't show up or call. I waited all day yesterday for someone from this board to come by to see the 73 2002. They never called, they never came by, and they offered a lame excuse and apology.

I am prety frustrated with buyers right now (3 of the 4 bad experiences are related to selling either of the 02's to poeple who contacted me from this forum). Should I stop trusting them? Should I stop being so nice?

What is wrong with people? Why isn't their word their bond? Why are broken commitments brushed aside so easily? Why do they think it is okay to be unethical/dishonest/immoral?

Brian (Irvine CA)

[jerry]

i feel your pain. i think long and hard before committing to a Craigslist meeting because it really is a bummer to deal with 'no-shows'.

the only suggestion i have is to only arrange meetings that work with YOUR schedule. if someone is serious and you are offering a GOOD value and not merely a FAIR value, they'll be there.

i think Craigslist buyers (myself included), appeals mostly to people seeking bargains, not really fair market value.

there is also the inititial excitement over finding what appears to be a good buy, but with time, other factors weigh in, such as inertia, laziness and to a large extent, the willingness to deal with traffic after a day at work.

[KFunk]

It's not just this forum or CL. Check out this rant on our local forum, just trying to give away one damn door:

http://www.autocrossforum.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=7167&hl=civic+door

I really don't understand it myself, either. If you say you're gonna be somewhere, then be somewhere. If something else comes up unplanned, then tell them you've got other plans. If you absolutely can't make it, then just make a 30 second phone call or text message or some shit, its not that hard. And if I'm not absolutely certain I'll be able to make it somewhere, I'll never tell you for sure that I'll be there. I'll say I'll try, but no promises. More than likely I'll show up, but I don't want you to plan on me being there, so it won't screw things up if I'm not there.

I rarely ever sell anything, so I could just imagine what you frequent sellers put up with. When I left Hawaii, I tried to sell all my furniture and crap thru craigslist and got 100% flake response. When I sent an e-mail to the UH grad student mailing list, I sold all my crap within a couple days. A much smaller pool of people yet a way higher degree of reliability.

But flaking is remarkably rampant, and the relative silence in response to your post might be a sign. I can't stand just trying to get people together to do something fun for free, even remarkably awesome stuff. I just don't do it at all, or plan on doing it by myself.

I was quite proud of myself for getting 4 bikers together on Saturday for a long cruise thru extremely twisty roads. I had the challenge of finding 4 people with fairly reliable running motorcycles, that also aren't jackasses or flakes.

If only we could reward reliable people somehow better in society...

[jerry]

But flaking is remarkably rampant, and the relative silence in response to your post might be a sign. I can't stand just trying to get people together to do something fun for free, even remarkably awesome stuff.

If only we could reward reliable people somehow better in society...

yea, that's a good point. i have been a member of a group who have met for volleyball on Thursday afternnoons for the past 6 years. people come and go and only a select few have actually maintained a consistent appearance but it appears that this year may not materialize at all. it's a pity because when one gets into a routine such as this it can be very rewarding, but overcoming the intitial potential energy barrier is getting harder and harder.

who knows, maybe it's due to vicarious living through the internet? i find myself landscaping and gardening more and more rather than going out.

[schwarz75]

Brian, I know what you're talking about. A few years ago I tried to give away a complete '72 subframe with brake rotors, calipers, struts, sway bar, etc. It ended up being thrown away as scrap. I have many parts for 2002s and E21s (and two or three cars too, for that matter), collected over many years, that I would like to sell, but have put it off for quite a while.

[02Nut]

Brian,

Speaking of flaky - I took pix of the hood on Sunday but haven't downloaded and emailed them to you yet....

Tonight - really!

[ray_]

I have a question for you.

;-p

... Brian, good luck!

Cheers,

Ray

Brian,

Speaking of flaky - I took pix of the hood on Sunday but haven't downloaded and emailed them to you yet....

Tonight - really!

[slash02]

I too felt your pain.. I'll share what I've learnt.

For whatever reason, I seem to be encountering a higher degree of folks who think it is okay to:

1. Make an offer to buy and then not carry through. And, I don't collect a deposit because I would still prefer to trust people to want to buy the car.

You cant trust people, they suck. I had a guy string me along for a week with promises of purchase when he "got back into town" from a trip. etc. etc. finally he makes a date to come and pay and pick the car up and nothing. From that point on, I would answer any emails that said "i'd like to come and buy the car" or "could you hold the car" with the same thing: an email requesting a deposit, and essentially a contract they could sign which said that this deposit was for holding the vehicle for x days, and they would forfeit the deposit if the vehicle was not paid in full by x days...

That really shut off the flakes.

2. Tell me they will meet and then they don't show up or call. I waited all day yesterday for someone from this board to come by to see the 73 2002. They never called, they never came by, and they offered a lame excuse and apology.

You're too nice. I wait a maximum of about 30 minutes, again after dealing with flakes. If they do not have the common courtesy to call and say they will be late. screw em, there's other buyers out there.

I am prety frustrated with buyers right now (3 of the 4 bad experiences are related to selling either of the 02's to poeple who contacted me from this forum). Should I stop trusting them? Should I stop being so nice?

Basically. I had people want to buy the car outright, then not show up, or ask to see it, then not show up, I had one who I held the car for as we conversed via email quite a bit, then he dissapeared.. Actually deleted his gmail account! So yeah, approach it like a business transaction and dont be so "nice" and you'll be ok.

What is wrong with people? Why isn't their word their bond? Why are broken commitments brushed aside so easily? Why do they think it is okay to be unethical/dishonest/immoral?

Brian (Irvine CA)

I have no idea, but its not just in California. Lol In Calgary it was the same thing, it could be in my case the price was pretty low so all the bottom feeders showed up.. Dont know. But I hope what I wrote helps a bit.

[Hammer03]

I too felt your pain.. I'll share what I've learnt.

For whatever reason, I seem to be encountering a higher degree of folks who think it is okay to:

1. Make an offer to buy and then not carry through. And, I don't collect a deposit because I would still prefer to trust people to want to buy the car.

You cant trust people, they suck. I had a guy string me along for a week with promises of purchase when he "got back into town" from a trip. etc. etc. finally he makes a date to come and pay and pick the car up and nothing. From that point on, I would answer any emails that said "i'd like to come and buy the car" or "could you hold the car" with the same thing: an email requesting a deposit, and essentially a contract they could sign which said that this deposit was for holding the vehicle for x days, and they would forfeit the deposit if the vehicle was not paid in full by x days...

That really shut off the flakes.

When I sell things, I generally won't hold them for people for just that reason. First one with the money gets it... If your price is fair, other people will be interested.

Also, like others have said, don't bend over backwards to meet up with people who may or may not show. Find a place near you and a time convenient for you, and have them work it out.

[bent]

For whatever reason, I seem to be encountering a higher degree of folks who think it is okay to:

1. Make an offer to buy and then not carry through. And, I don't collect a deposit because I would still prefer to trust people to want to buy the car.

2. Tell me they will meet and then they don't show up or call. I waited all day yesterday for someone from this board to come by to see the 73 2002. They never called, they never came by, and they offered a lame excuse and apology.

I am prety frustrated with buyers right now (3 of the 4 bad experiences are related to selling either of the 02's to poeple who contacted me from this forum). Should I stop trusting them? Should I stop being so nice?

What is wrong with people? Why isn't their word their bond? Why are broken commitments brushed aside so easily? Why do they think it is okay to be unethical/dishonest/immoral?

Brian (Irvine CA)

So is that better or worse than people showing up unexpectedly?

FWIW, Brian's '73 would make a great start for someone's roundie project. Dry and rust free in all of the important areas, quite straight other than the small parking damage, and pretty much unmolested. Needs paint and a thorough going through, but as something to start with, much better than 99% of the '02s most people start with in the midwest and east. Wish I had a use for it, probably would've followed me home if I did.

[2761377]

What is wrong with people? Why isn't their word their bond? Why are broken commitments brushed aside so easily? Why do they think it is okay to be unethical/dishonest/immoral?

brian, you are living in another world. children just are not brought up correctly anymore, for the most part, and they show it as adults. i could go into my well-developed theory for this, but i can sum it up with one word-affluence. as a country, not as a family. you were raised by folks who wouldn't recoginize this country if they were time-transported from your childhood.

a modern variation on a theme from our youth- don't trust anyone UNDER 30.

when you make an appointment, make it for a 1/2 hour window at your convenience. get their phone number so you can call them if they are late. no #, no appointment.

i feel your pain, having recently driven to san diego and back in a fruitless chase for e30 parts. speaking of which, can you tell the name of the detail shop you use? i remember they did a great job on the chamonix you had several years ago.

thanks,

robert w.

[Hammer03]

a modern variation on a theme from our youth- don't trust anyone UNDER 30.

thanks,

robert w.

As a person under 30, who has had several people from the apparently more trustworthy age bracket flake on him, I think there is less of a correlation. But hey, what do I know, I'm just some dumb flakey kid who won't ever keep his word, right?

Maybe we should say don't trust any old folks, because they're of unstable mind and afraid of technology?

OR, we could just skip the generalizations, and recognize that people of all ages can be flakes. Maybe don't trust anyone who doesn't already own a 2002... That may be fair

[KFunk]

If you're selling, you work for the buyer. Customer is ALWAYS right, son.

Cute rule to live by, but I disagree. There are no such solid rules. Sometimes you're doing someone a favor by giving them a much better price than normal, and sometimes the customer is a lying jackass that wastes your time.

[pureaudio]

and most of the time the customer is a lying jackass that wastes your time.

Fixed for truth. When I sell things now I make sure that I was going to be home anyways and I don't wait around. Saying the customer is always right is how jackasses justify treating people like crap.